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It was truly a confirmation that having a history together bonds a couple like no other.
It was very disturbing to find out several of the men who were with us are (or have been) divorced, with one friend being on his third marriage.
I have to think that rarely is the other person worth giving everything up for.
The cheating spouse is giving up their family, friends, home, their past, their assets, and almost everything in their life for this other person, who in many cases they hardly even know.
It was overwhelming to hear how difficult divorce is, and I wonder if they could have looked into the future, would they have tried harder to save the marriage.
I met one woman who was the “friend” of one of Doug’s frat brothers who also is divorced.
When they are fifty and have so much history behind them, it is difficult for the cheating spouse to start again from scratch after the affair.As we began talking, I found out that ironically her daughter attends the same school and plays on the same soccer team as our daughters do.We had a lot in common and talked for quite a long time.They were going through a difficult time and were very busy working full time, taking care of the kids and tending to her husband’s sick parents.Her husband found someone who gave him the attention that was lacking at home. It seems to me that it’s a common thread that for some reason, the cheating spouse thinks that the other person cares more for them than his/her own spouse does.
I wonder how many marriages end because of infidelity with the cheating spouse living with regret about their decisions.